22 Ways to Say “I Love You” Without Words

I wrote this post years ago when Ron and I were celebrating our 57th wedding anniversary.

He’s gone now.

And sitting with these words today, I find they mean something different than they did when I first wrote them. They feel less like tips and more like treasures — small ordinary moments I’m grateful we didn’t let slip by unnoticed.

If you have someone to love, please don’t wait for a special occasion. Don’t save the good china, the romantic evening, or the note you’ve been meaning to write. Do it today. Do it tomorrow. Do it on a completely unremarkable Tuesday.

Because one day, ordinary Tuesdays become the ones you miss most.

Here’s what 57 years taught me about saying I love you without words:

1. You thank strangers for small kindnesses. Don’t forget to occasionally send your loved one a genuine thank you note or gift just for being who they are.
2. Surprise them with a favorite book, chocolates, tea, or whatever they enjoy but don’t always buy for themselves.
3. Leave a trail of little love notes leading somewhere special. It doesn’t have to be elaborate. It just has to be intentional.
4. When your partner is stressed, plan something fun and carefree. A drive with no destination. A picnic somewhere you’ve never been. Ride a carousel together just because you can.
5. For the frequent traveler, tuck little love notes into the suitcase along with something small to make them smile when they’re far from home.
6. Draw a hot bubble bath with favorite music and a favorite drink. Then close the door, keep the world quiet, and let them simply rest. You’ll both feel better for it.
7. Plan a romantic evening at home. A favorite meal, candlelight, quiet music — and a bouquet of balloons. Before inflating each one, slip a note inside. A back massage. A long kiss. Whatever makes you both laugh or blush. Let them pop one whenever they choose.
8. Leave a note on their car. No explanation needed.
9. Call their favorite radio station and dedicate a song to them during their morning commute. Old fashioned? Absolutely. Unforgettable? Yes.
10. Give them a teddy bear — a real one to hold when you’re not there. It sounds silly until it doesn’t.
11. Send an unexpected gift to their workplace with a note that it isn’t to be opened until you’re alone together that evening. Anticipation is its own kind of love language.
12. Take a moonlight drive on a full moon night. End up somewhere quiet with a late picnic. The stars are free.
13. Reach over and touch them for no reason at all. Just because they’re there and you’re grateful.
14. Give an unexpected bear hug in the middle of an ordinary moment. Those are the hugs that get remembered.
15. Greet them at the door. Every time. As if their coming home is still something worth celebrating — because it is.
16. Send a cake or a giant cookie with I Love You written on it. Not for a birthday. Not for an anniversary. Just for a Wednesday.
17. Put a sticky note on their calendar that says I Love You. Put another one the next day that says Even More Than Yesterday. Keep going as long as you can.
18. Send a box of gift-wrapped cookies with a note asking Will You Be My Valentine? This doesn’t have to be February. Any day works just as well.
19. When they reach for you, reach back. Return the hug, the kiss, the smile, the look. Don’t let those moments pass unreturned.
20. Hold hands when you’re out together. A gentle touch is something every human needs and most of us forget to give.
21. Take care of something they hate doing — fold the laundry, make the difficult phone call, clean out the refrigerator. Love is also showing up for the unglamorous parts.
22. Put down your phone. Close the computer. Turn off the television. Look at them. Actually listen to what they’re saying. They are more important than any of it.